I watched Tropic Thunder last week, and to be, it's the most funniest movie I've seen for 2008. This is a movie not for kiddies. With foul language, sexual content, and a little offensive to retarted people.
When I insert the DVD in to the movie, pressed play, I was shocked to see the first 'advertisement' in the movie, about an energy drink called 'Booty Sweat'.Now the first advertisement was about Alpha Chino's (played by Brandon T. Jackson) energy drink, 'Booty Sweat' and 'Bust-A-Nut' candy bar.
Yeah, I thought the drink doesn't exist, but it is out in stores in America. I wonder what's the taste like of drinking people's sweat, from their booty?
Ewwwww....anyway, back to the movie.
Then the second 'trailer' shows Tugg Speedman's (played by Ben Stiller) movie, Scorcher IV : Global Meltdown.
Third movie trailer is Jeff Portnoy's (played by Jack Black) movie called The Fatties : Fart 2 , is actually like Eddie Murphy's "Nutty Professor, only more farts and less dialog.
Now my favourite trailer, which is the last one and the funniest before the actual movie starts, is called 'Satan's Alley". This movie is played by 5 time Academy Award winner and 6 time Crying Monkey award winner (LOL) Kirk Lazarus (played by Robert Downey Jr.) and Tobey Maguire (cameoing himself) as secretly gay monks in an 18th century monastery. This is like a direct hit at Ang Lee's award winning gay cowboy movie, "Brokeback Mountain".
Now Tropic Thunder the movie, is about Tugg Speedman, a once highest paid actor now a dying star, Jeff Portnoy, a heroin addicted comedian, Kirk Lazarus, a 5 time Academy Award winner and 6 time Crying Monkey award winner, Alpa Chino, a rapper with his own energy drink, and Kevin Sandusky, a newcomer.
All these prima donna actors (except Kevin Sandusky) are starring in the most expensive war film based on the Vietnam War and the book about it called 'Tropic Thunder", which is writen by Vietnam vetaran John 'Four Leaf' Tayback.
The movie is behind a months schedule, and they screwed it up because of the actors.
Now the movie 'Tropic Thunder" is backed up by foul-mouthed executive Les Grossman (played by Tom Cruise, surprised huh?). Les then hits at the movie's director Damien Cockburn (*giggles*.....the last name), played by Steve Coogan for failing to finish the movie in time and not able to handle big stars like Tugg and Kirk.
So one night, the Vietnam vetaran and director Cockburn had a plan to save the film and create history. So one day, both of them and explosion effects operator Cody Underwood (Danny R. McBride) drops the spoiled actors into the middle of the jungle, where he installs hidden cameras and special-effect explosions rigged so he can film the movie in 'guerrilla style'.
Damien died shorty after accidentally stepping on a old land mine. Blown into pieces, Tugg Speedman thinks that Damien's 'death' is fake and he's trying to play all 5 actor's mind. This scene was quite disgusting, when Ben Stiller's character lifts up Damien's blown head, licks it to taste whether is it made up of corn syrup. Its funny, and gross.
So, nearby a bunch of real gang soldiers from this group called the 'Flamming Dragons' heard the actors shouting, as the actors are trying to act out the scene. When the soldiers starts to shoot them, the actors returned fire with their fake guns with blanks. And all 5 of them still thought that it is all part of the movie, especially Tugg. After Tugg Speedman threw a fake gernade, Cody then detonated a bomb that is planted near the Flamming Dragons position. And still....Tugg thinks it's all fake.
Kirk, Kevin and Alpha only thinks that the whole think is real after examine Damien's body pieces.
Soon, after an arguement, Tugg Speedman decides to go finish the movie alone, while the rest decides to fall back, because Tugg Speedman is lost and doesn't know his way.
Tugg Speedman accidentally killed a panda at night, raining when he thought a bear was attacking him. He then took the panda's head and made it as a mask, cuz Tugg Speedman was slowly going insane.
Speedman is captured and taken to the Flaming Dragon's heroin factory, which he initially believes to be a prisoner-of-war camp from the script. The gang soon realizes that he is the star of the box office bomb 'Simple Jack' (the only movie they have, on VHS) and force him to reenact it several times a day.
Flamming Dragon's leader, Tran is played by child actor Brandon Soo Hoo, who can be seen having a cigarette in his mouth.
Meanwhile back in L.A, Tugg's manager, Rick Peck (played by Matthew McConaughey) is trying to talk Les Grossman to pay a 50 million dollar ransom to free Tugg Speedman. Instead, Les Grossman asked Flamming Dragons to screw themselves in the face.
Second time Flamming Dragons called up and said that 'price gone up to 100 million dollar, and if they don't pay up, Simple Jack will die'. Les Grossman still call them to screw themselves, and hangs up.
"We don't negotiate with terrorists." Les Grossman. Good quote.
Less Grossman tells Rick Peck that if Tugg Speedman dies, they'll be able to benefit from his death through insurance claims, and then tells Rick Peck that he can be a G5 owner instead.
Here's the scene.
Les Grossman: Speedman is a dying star. A white dwarf headed for a black hole. That's physics. It's inevitable.
Studio Executive Rob Slolom: We've been handed an incredible opportunity here, Peck.
Les Grossman: The universe... is talking to us right now. You just gotta listen.
[turns on Flo Rider's "Low" and begins to dance to the beat]
Les Grossman: See, this is the good part, Pecker. This is when the job gets fun! Ask... and you shall receive!
Studio Executive Rob Slolom: [dancing along] Right...
Les Grossman: You play ball... we play ball. I knoowwww... you want the goodies!
Studio Executive Rob Slolom: Welcome to the goodie room!
Les Grossman: You paying attention? I'm talking... G5, Pecker! That's how you can roll. No more frequent flyer bitch miles for my boy! Oh yeah! Playa... playa! Big dick playa!
Studio Executive Rob Slolom: Swinging past ya knees!
Les Grossman: Big dick, baby!
Studio Executive Rob Slolom: Yep.
Les Grossman: [turns off the music] Or... you can grow a conscience in the next five minutes and see where that takes you.
Rick Peck: Now let me get this straight. You want me to let my client of 15 years, one of my best
friends, die in the jungle alone, for some money and a G5?
Les Grossman: Yes.
Rick Peck: [pause] A G5 airplane?
Les Grossman: Yes... and lots of money... playaaaa!
[turns on the music and dances again]
Damn, that was the best scene. Imagine Tom Cruise, dancing along to Flo Rida's Low.
The other actors were trying to find Speedman, and they stumbled upon Flamming Dragon's heroin plant, which they also saw Speedman being tortured, which he still thinks it's all part of the movie.
The planned to rescue Tugg by sending Kirk to act as a farmer, and Jeff being tied to a water buffalo half naked with his underpants only. This plan was thought by Kevin, who read the whole book 'Tropic Thunder'.
Kevin Sandusky : Did you read the script?
Kirk Lazarus: I don't read the script. The script reads me.
Kirk and Alpa Chino then scout for the last time to the Flamming Dragon's base to check on Tugg Speedman, who is still acting as Simple Jack for the villagers. Jeff then told Kevin whether can he not go for the rescue mission and stay to protect the backpacks and so just in case. Kevin said no, cuz it's all part of the plan. Jeff then confessed that the Jellybeans he ate earlier on are heroin. So, he begged Kevin to tie him on a tree, literally. And he did. On that night when they set camp, they discussed about their love life. Kirk clears rumours of him and Jennifer Love Hewit together, Kevin with nobody, and Alpa.......confessed while he wrote the song 'I Love Pussy' for the commercial of his energy drink, 'Booty Sweat', he was thinking of Lance, a dude.
Now here's the scene.
Alpa Chino: No, I always wanted to. I guess I just never had the courage to ask. It's complicated.
Kirk Lazarus: Nah! It's simple as pie man, you plant your feet on the ground, you look her square in the eyes you say "Hey! baby, you and me's goin' on a date, that's in the story"... What's her name?
Alpa Chino: ...Lance
Kirk Lazarus: You say 'Listen here, Lance'... Lance? What the fuck did I just hear? Lance?
Kevin Sandusky: Did you just say Lance?
Alpa Chino: No! No, I didn't say Lance. I said Nance.
Kevin Sandusky: It sounded a lot like Lance.
Alpa Chino: Dammit, I'm Alpa Chino! 'I Love Tha Pussy', aight? Lay yo ass back down and look at the stars.
Kirk Lazarus: When you wrote 'I Love Tha Pussy', was you thinking about danglin your dice on Lance's forehead?
Kirk Lazarus: It's Hollywood, man! Everyone turns gay at some point!
Alpa Chino: I'm not gay! I love tha pussy!
LOL!!!
Alpha Chino sewed a costume for Kirk, who will disguise as a Chinese farmer. Here's the scene.
Jeff Portnoy: So, what's the plan, man? You gonna talk Vietnamese to those dudes?
Kirk Lazarus: No, no. Mandarin Chinese. What I can tell, it's what they're speaking down there.
Jeff Portnoy: How the hell do you know Chinese?
Kirk Lazarus: Land of Silk and Money with Gong Li. Second Globe, third Oscar. I prepped for
that one by working in a Beijing textile factory for eight months.
So the plan worked, and when Kirk reveals himself to Tran right after he changed his line by saying he has a drug farm after saying he has a paddy farm. So here's his infamous quote before flashing 2 heavy machine guns, fake to Tran and his henchman.
Kirk Lazarus: Here's my mothafuckin' farm!
[pulls out guns and starts firing and whooping]
Kirk Lazarus: I'm a lead farmer, motherfucker!
Everyone ducked down for cover, Jeff then pulled out a fake handgun, carried Tran and asked him where is the heroins, and ran for the place.
Kevin and Kirk then searched for Tugg Speedman, but they managed to find Cody and John 'Four Leaf' Tayback, both tied to a post. Then Kirk managed to find Tugg Speedman, who refuses to leave after saying that 'he is at home, performing shows for the villagers.
Jeff Portnoy had to finished off Tran after being attacked by that little fella while trying to fit into a women's clothes to cover his fat body. He punded Tran, and with his heavy body, they both crashed to a basement, with heroins.
Kevin found Jeff, nearly consuming all of the drugs. He tried to convince Jeff not to do it, but Jeff says he deserve it for being a clown to the world, saying they only laugh at him because of his farts only.
2 soldiers came, Jeff got scared until he farted. Both soldiers laughed, Jeff not amused, with heroin covered his hands, he buries his hands on the soldier's face, drugging both of them. Jeff and Kevin then finds Kirk dealing Tugg Speedman.
Tugg Speedman: My son gave this to me.
Kirk Lazarus: That's your stick buddy?
Tugg Speedman: His name is Twiggman.
Kirk Lazarus: Does he want to come with us?
Tugg Speedman: The dudes are emerging...
Kirk Lazarus: I know who I am! I'm a dude playing a dude disgused as another dude!
Kevin Sandusky: What?
Kirk Lazarus: You're a dude that don't know what dude he is!
Tugg Speedman: Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is and claims to know what dude he is...
Jeff Portnoy: What the fuck are you guys talking about?
Tugg Speedman: - by playing other dudes?
Kevin Sandusky : What is going on?
Tugg Speedman: The dudes are emerging...
Kirk Lazarus : You're right, I'm no Lincoln Osiris, or Father O'mallie
Tugg Speedman: The dudes are emerging...
Kevin Sandusky : The insecurity level of you guys are ridiculous.
Kevin Sandusky: Tugg. Tugger. You're the last piece of the puzzle buddy. We need you! Your men need you. Are you with us?
Tugg Speedman: [pause] I'm a rooster illusion.
Kevin Sandusky: Fuck it. We'll deal with him later.
As they finally got Tugg Speedman to get out of the hell hole, they find Four Leaf helping them by flame-throwing towards soldiers who were shooting at them. Alpa Chino joined them to escape to the helicopter by a truck. As they board on, Tran is seen walking out of a house which is on fire, holding a rocket launcher. As he shoots the rocket, which manage to blow the truck upside down. Kevin was seriously hurt, Jeff injured his ass. Tugg finally regained his mentality and managed to remember Kevin's last name, Sandusky. The joke about Kevin is that no one can remember his name. Seriously, watch the movie.
They got across the bridge, before Cody detonates it. But Tugg Speedman wants to stay, as he 'claims' he has a connection with them. Well, Kirk then goes along with the rest. As the chopter was about to take off, Tugg Speedman is seen attacked by the angry villagers and regreted to stay. As Tran was about to shoot another rocket towards them, Tugg's agent, Rick Peck then appears with a TiVo. Rick Peck was furious that Tugg didn't get TiVo when he's shooting the movie. So, Rick decides to give it to his client of 15 years himself.
As the rocket was heading towards them, Rick threw the TiVo, which saved them, and then the camera zooms out, we can see Kirk anouncing the nominees for the Oscars. And Tugg won best actor. His fellow actors and friends we're cheering for him. Kevin dates Jennifer Love Hewit, Alpa Chino with Lance Bass, a former N'Sync star.
Tropic Thunder generated 8 Oscars, 400 million and saved Speedman's career.
I rate this movie....a 9.8/10
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