Friday, January 8, 2010

Daniel Mak's Awesome Awards for Music in 2009

2009 in music was mixed with good and bad. The death of Micheal Jackson was the one that shocked everyone, Chris Brown's beating towards Rihanna nearly ended his career. Kanye West totally made himself an ass on MTV, Taylor Swift dominating every awards, Lil' Wayne being....still being Lil' Wayne. Autotune was so popular, everyone's using it. So, honestly, 2009 ain't such a good year but its not total shit mind you. So here I am, after 2 weeks of deep thinking and without any discussion with my readers, I am gonna list out my very own awards to the artistes that made a huge impact back in 2009. Some of them you wish they exists :D Before the Grammy Awards XD

Here it goes for the songs category

Best Song To Listen When Being Involved In A Serious Argument :
"Gives You Hell" by the All American Rejects

Best Song To Listen After A Day's Work, Stress, Stuck In A Traffic Jam and Any Other Situations That Can Be Related :
"I Gotta Feeling" - The Black Eyed Peas

Best Song To Sing To A Girl You Meet In A Bar If You Can't Find The Right Words to Start A Conversation :
"Sexy Chick" -David Guetta feat. Akon (read the lyrics)

Most Catchy Line To Sing :
"Mama Do" - Pixie Lott (sing the chorus)

Best Song For After Break Up :
"Lovedrunk" - Boys Like Girls

Best Song To Listen Before or On The Way To Go To A Club :
'Tik Tok" - Ke$ha

Best Song To Be A Fine Example of What Happens In Vegas, Stays In Vegas :
"Waking Up In Vegas" - Katy Perry

Song To Be Too Obvious To Show That It's Autotuned
"Blame It" - Jamie Foxx feat. T-Pain

Best Song For A Tourism Campaign :
"Empire State Of Mind" - Jay Z feat. Alicia Keys

Best Song To Describe The Music Industry Today :
"D.O.A (Death Of Autotune) - Jay Z

Best Song Where East Meets West :
"Be With You" - Wilber Pan feat. Akon

Best Song To Be Played In A Club :
Any Pitbull song

Best Song For Someone Who Wants To Bring A Girl To A Hotel Room For More Than A Kiss :
"Hotel Room Service" - Pitbull

Best Song For Someone Who Wants To Turn Over A New Leaf :
"Dead And Gone" T.I feat. Justin Timberlake

Best Song For Independant Ladies (holla!!!) :
"Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It) - Beyonce

Best Song For Someone Who Wants To Have Body Contact With You :
"I Wanna" - All American Rejects

Best Song To Listen While Playing Poker :
"Poker Face" - Lady Gaga

Best Song That Will Make You Shed A Tear :
"I Dreamed A Dream" - Susan Boyle

Best Song For Someone Who Still Doesn't Know Why Love Is So Cruel :
"Battlefield" - Jordin Sparks

Best Song For A Fashion Show :
"Beautiful" - Akon feat. Colby O'Donis and Kardinal Offishall

Best Song For A Guy To Describe His Ex A Cruel Person :
"Heartless" - Kanye West

Best Song To Tell You Not To Trust A Whore :
"Don't Trust Me" - 3OH3!

Best Song To Feature A Secret Word :
"If You Seek Amy" - Britney Spears (go figure what word she's trying to tell you)

Best Song For A Women Who Wished To Be A Man :
"If I Were A Boy" Beyonce

Sounds Like Sean Kingston, But It Ain't Sean Kingston :
'Replay" - I.Y.A.Z

Best Song Directly Telling That You're Being Used :
"Use Somebody" - Kings Of Leon

Best Song To Repeat The Main Title So Many Times :
"Down" - Jay Sean feat. Lil' Wayne

Best Song To Feature The Sickest Rap :
"Forever" - Eminem's part, the rest are R-U-B-B-I-S-H

Best Song To Sing To Your Soulmate Telling He/She Belongs To You :
"You Belong With Me" - Taylor Swift

Best Soundtrack :
"Meet Me On The Equinox" - Death Cab For A Cutie (OST to New Moon)

A Tribute To Insects :
"Fireflies" - Owl City

Most Addictive Song :
"I Gotta Feeling" - The Black Eyed Peas

Best Song To Sing When You Liked Someone, He/She Rejected You and When You Moved On, He/She Likes You :
"Prom Queen" - Lil Wayne

Best Song(s) That Everyone Listened :
"I Gotta Feeling" - I Gotta Feeling

Best Song To Tell Your Boyfriend/Girlfriend That You're In A Club and Damn Right You Don't Wanna Pick Up Your Telephone :
'Telephone" : Lady Gaga feat. Beyonce

Best Song To Describe Your Boyfriend/Girlfriend That She's Like That Annoying Tune/Melody That's Stuck In Your Head :
"Replay" - I.Y.A.Z

Best Song To Feature Numbers In Numerical Sequence :
"1,2,3,4" - Plain White Teas

Best Song To Not Feature The Title Track :
"Empire State Of Mind" - Jay Z feat. Alicia Keys

Best Song To Feature Any Of The Autobots/Decepticons From Transformers Series :
"I Can Transform Ya" - Chris Brown feat. Lil' Wayne, Swizz Beats

Best Song To Tell A Guy That She's Happy But Deep Down She's Damn Sad :
"Happy" - Leona Lewis

Best Song To Describe The Current Social Problems On Earth :
"Change" - Daniel Merriweather feat. Wale

Best Song To Feature A Tune/Melody From A Frank Sinatra Old Song :
"D.O.A (Death Of Autotune) - Jay Z "Nananana.....heeeyyy.....gooodbyyeeeee"

Most Beautifully Written Song :
"Halo" - Beyonce

That One Song Where We Learn One Hindi/Tamil/Indian/Punjabi word :
"Jai Ho" - A.R.Rahman feat. The Pussycatdolls

Best Song For A Fan To Tell His/Her Favourite Idol That He/She is His/Her Biggest Fan :
"Paparazzi" - Lady Gaga

Best Song For A Maxis/Digi 3G Videocall Commercial/Advertisement :
"Videophone" - Beyonce feat. Lady Gaga

Best Song Title Which Looks Like A Question To You :
"How Do You Sleep" - Jesse McCartney feat. Ludacris

Best Song To Tell Your Best Friend That You Fell For Him/Her :
"Lucky" - Jason Mraz feat. Colbie Caillat

Best Song To Tell You That More Than One Is Better :
"2 Is Better Than 1" - Boys Like Girls feat. Taylor Swift

Best Album That Everyone Should Own/Illegally Download Through UTorrent :
"The E.N.D" - The Black Eyed Peas

Best Song To Tell You That I Want Nobody But You :
"Nobody But You" - Wondergirls

Best Song To Party Like There's No Tomorrow :
"I Gotta Feeling" - The Black Eyed Peas

Best Song To Tell Us That We Have To Live Like We're Dying :
"Live Like We're Dying" - Kris Allen

Best Song To Describe A Very Very Hot Chick :
"Starstrukk" - 3OH3! feat. Katy Perry

Best Song To Sing To Your Girlfriend/Wife On Your Wedding/Anniversary :
"Halo" - Beyonce

Ok, now for the dubious honours...

Best Song That No One Listened :
"Never Leave You" Tinchy Stryder feat. Amelle from Sugarbabes

Worst Song Everyone Listened :
"Boom Boom Pow" - The Black Eyed Peas. Yes, I mean..."I sold 3008, you sold 2000 late?" WTF?

Worst Song To Be Constantly Played On Mainstream Radio Every Hour :
"Love Story", "You Belong With Me" by Taylor Swift

Best Song That The Singer Himself/Herself Need No Effort Into Making This One :
"I'mma Be" - The Black Eyed Peas

Worst Album For A Rapper Who Tried So Hard To Sound Like T-Pain :
"808 & Heartbreaks" - Kanye West

Most Boring Song :
"No Surprise" - Daughtry

Worst Ending For A Song :
"Videophone" - Beyonce feat. Lady Gaga. Beyonce moaning at the end of the song.....not very nice.

Worst Start For A Song :
"Forever" - Drake feat. Kanye West, Lil Wayne, Eminem. Seriously, a buzzer? WTF

Worst Album That You Should Throw Away Or Make It As A Coaster For Your Drinks :
"Rebirth" - Lil Wayne. Terrible, one single and that's it?

Worst Album Art Cover :
"No Line On The Horizon" - U2. Looks good in a art gallery, but for an album cover, Bono can't save it this time.

Worst Use Of Technology :
Autotune, hands down, bar none.

Worst Way To Start Describing Yourself In Your Debut Hit Song In A Cocky Way :
"Forever" - Drake feat. Kanye West, Lil' Wayne and Eminem. "Last name ever, first name greatest" arse Drake.

Worst Song To Sing To A Girl Just After The First Date :
"I Wanna" - All American Rejects

Worst Infectious Melody From A Hit Song :
"Right Round" - Flo Rida feat. Keisha

You Think It Sounds Like Katy Perry, But Its Some No-Name Chick Singing It :
"Right Round" - Flo Rida feat. Keisha

Worst Rap Which Makes No Sense :
"Run This Town" - Jay Z feat. Rihanna, Kanye West. Especially Kanye West, "have you ever had shoes without shoe strings?" which idiot doesn't check the shoes first before walking out of the store?

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